First story: I remember walking with her in Oaxaca. It was late at night. We walked along the roads where the locals were setting up their stands for the market day the next morning. We walked and talked for a long time. Every so often a giant rat would run across our paths. Wendy was pretty scared. After seeing several rats I stopped for a second to “tie my shoe” then quickly ran my fingers up Wendy’s calf in a scratching motion. After she screamed I found out how strong she was. She started chasing me and did get one good kick in. I deserved it of course.

Second story: Wendy was pretty good at getting her way! She talked me into piggy backing her all the way from the Hotel Zaculeu in Huehuetenango to the Mayan ruins at nearby Zaculeu – all at a good running speed. The locals looked at us as if we were crazy. Eventually we arrived at the ruins and sat down on top of one of the walls. We sat and talked about life for a few hours and watched the sunset. I have such fond memories of that time.

Wendy was a very high energy, confident, strong both in mind and body, thoughtful person. Obviously those traits stayed with her.

My wife and I attended the memorial last Saturday. What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful person. She was obviously blessed to have such a loving caring family.

Ever since April 3 I have been visited by the happy image of that young woman smiling at me across a table from 40 years ago. Even though she is gone, I am going to treasure Wendy’s bright spirit she showed me so long ago.

She encouraged self-awareness. What are your beliefs and values? Where did they come from? Now what are you going to do next?

Later on, in developing the Youth Inclusion Awareness Project, a workshop series envisioned by Bev Siver, Wendy provided invaluable feedback. She was there to witness the pilot workshop presented at the Olympic and Paralympic Youth Leadership Academy at the BC Winter Games. She was right in there amongst the forty or so ebullient pre-teens, smiling and nodding in support, shouting out when she saw fit to do so. Providing a forum to talk openly about gender, heterosexism and homophobia, bullying, harassment, racism and albeism was enlivening for all involved.  It would not have been possible without guidance from Wendy. This was just one of many many projects she played a hand in carrying out.

Wendy elegantly relayed the difference between equality and equity to me when I was struggling to come up with something kids could relate to during the gender component. “Imagine you have a ten year old and a two year old who are waiting for a drink at a water fountain.  The ten year old can reach on their own. The two year old needs a boost.” Just ask President Obama who acknowledges that he would not be where he is today had it not been for affirmative action plans (his boost) in place at Harvard’s School of Law.

I definitely took notice of how Wendy carried herself.  She was a strong woman who never compromised her ideals by wearing the power suit with pumps. She never claimed to have ‘bigger balls’ to further herself or her fight for increased access and opportunity for all.  In other words, she was not a pseudo-man. She stood not for women’s rights but for everyone’s rights.  She showed me that caring for another is not a sign of weakness, that by developing relationships and connecting with others you can inspire action, one person at a time. She always asked me about how rowing at UBC was going and her remembering the details from all our past encounters instilled such a sense of pride in me.

Having known Wendy for a much too short a time, I do believe that being framed as a victim would not have sat well with such an indomitable spirit. Victimhood has nugatory effects versus the strengths-based approach she optimistically upheld.  Always diplomatic and astute, she armed herself with this credo in the fight for resources for people who are underserved (look, Wendy, I got it! Person-first!).

In this light, we should not give into the tyranny of the “what ifs?” but instead arm ourselves with hope and commit to her legacy.  I know I will continue to run that trail from my home down SW Marine to the University and rejoice in the privilege. I am blessed to have had the opportunity to learn from such a stalwart supporter of the underdog.